Build Real Friendships in Your 50s
I know making friends in your 50s is hard.
Life gets complicated. Time and energy become scarce, juggling family and work obligations on top of significant challenges, including relationship breakdowns, relocation, job loss, empty nest, or health issues.
Finding people who share your interests and are at the same stage of life is tough when places and opportunities to socialise become limited. It can feel like you’re missing out, especially when everyone has established friend groups.
It can be lonely and frustrating as you sit there and wonder, ‘Is it just me?’ Am I the only one who finds it hard? You can begin to feel isolated and resigned to the thought of never making new friends.
I know because I’ve been there.
Sitting by the pool in the hot summer of 2020, listening to the laughter drifting over from neighbouring properties, I’d never felt so lonely. I was about to turn 50 and wondered where all my friends had gone. I longed for a group of girlfriends with whom I could hang out and have fun with – as I had in my twenties and thirties.
When I returned to NZ from the UK 12 years ago, I thought I could rejoin the long-time friendships I’d left behind. But they’d moved on, and there was no room for me.
In my attempt to make new friends, I tried many things, joining different clubs to find like-minded women of a similar stage in life who were open to making new friends. However, many of the women I met didn’t have the time, availability or inclination to extend friendship to me because of their competing priorities. So, I gave up and buried myself in work.
And then Covid hit, and well, I don’t need to tell you the effect isolation had on friendships and connection for everyone. But, when everything went virtual, I discovered I wasn’t alone – many other women in their 50s were experiencing the same friendship challenges as me.
And I learned that friendship didn’t have to be so complicated.
We’re not taught how to make friends. Instead, we bumble along through trial and error, gathering rejection, hurt, and scars along the way.
But after reading everything there was to know about friendship on the web, in books, and from other experts, I discovered a clear and simple framework for building real friendships. Had I known this earlier, I could’ve avoided many mistakes that led to rejection, frustration, and loneliness.
Because when you understand how friendship works and follow a proven process, you feel relieved, excited and hopeful, knowing that real friendship is possible for you too.
I went from no friends to connecting with over 200 women in their 50s.
How?
I took action and created exactly what I was looking for.
I started a local Meetup group and committed to hosting a regular coffee morning – a chance to sit and chat over a cuppa each weekend with like-minded women. I showed up week after week for three solid months, rainy, cold, or tired, hosting 185 events over 18 months (with a full-time job and family). And women kept returning, week after week, and friendships started blossoming.
Using this framework, I not only made many new friends for myself but also solved the ‘where’ to find friends for other women.
And it’s fair to say I’ve gathered plenty of expertise in friendship, learned not only from previous mistakes but also from observing the simple mistakes other women continued to make. They were apparent to me because I’d made them all myself, before that is, using the framework that eliminated all the guesswork and confusion.
Therefore, I want to share this framework with you.
I’ve curated all that I’ve learnt from my personal experience, the mistakes of others, and advice from experts on the web to save you time, energy and angst. Lessons I’ve learned and distilled into a logical, principals-based framework that gives you a solid understanding of how friendship works and a clear process to building real friendships now and into the future for deeper connection.
If that is what you desire and are willing to take action and do the necessary work, then I’ll show you how.
However, before I do that, let me help you decide if what lies ahead will be worth your time and attention.
If you’re cynical or looking for a quick fix or instant best friends without changing a thing or doing the work, you might want to turn your attention elsewhere. Because if there’s one thing I know for sure, making friends takes time, effort, and consistency.
And it’s not easy.
However, if you’re self-aware of the challenges you face in making friends but know the importance of friendship, find value in personal growth and development, appreciate guidance and are willing to take action, then my promise to you is simple: your time and attention is valued and will be reciprocated, or you can opt-out at any time.
The next step is up to you.
If you want to come on a ten-day journey to building real friendships in your 50s, click the button below and enter your best email address.
Then keep an eye out on your inbox – it’ll be worth it.
