After spanking hundreds on professional wedding photos, this crappy little polaroid is by far my most treasured.
A spontaneous snapshot of wrinkle-free besties (minus one who was likely propping up the bar).
Strong, beautiful women who had my back throughout the very worst and best of my 20s.
In this moment, I thought we’d be forever, one cool gang like SATC but without the debauchery going forward.
And maybe we would have weathered life together and remained close friends if we had not dispersed around the globe soon after.
Expensive tolls and mail by snail made contact sporadic, and I was no longer privy to all the gory minutiae that best friends share.
Despite our rugged history BC (before complications), our friendship could not survive the long-distance wedge that remains to this day.
No matter how much you may want that one group of friends to stay the same forever, the odds are stacked against you.
Life is a constant state of flux, and you can’t travel the same path at the same time at the same pace as those you love. Friendships will change as you change and transition through each life stage.
You only have to look at your wedding photos and wonder where is everyone now, or who the hell is that?! Your bridesmaids of before will likely not be your bridesmaids of choice today, nor the ones of tomorrow.
Research suggests we replace half our friends every seven years, so making new friends has to be a lifetime endeavour.
You’ll need to get good at finding new friends, learn to evolve with current ones and be ok with letting go of old ones.
A bevvy of acquaintances, occasional friends, situational friends, fun hangout friends, and support friends will move naturally through your revolving door. Very few will enter the inner sanctum of rare confidantes who are in it for life with you.
So you’ll need to have realistic expectations.
Whilst our friends may not be forever, they are just a memory away. Enjoy each friend and the richness they bring to your life, for however long that may be.
p.s. Want to find friends for more fun, laughter and happiness in your life? Download the Quick Start Guide to finding fabulous friends in your 50s for meaningful connections that will bring you joy. It’s FREE!